Are you Really Independent?
By Rion Williams As adults we think that we are independent, but in reality very few people are truly independent. They’re just grown up kids. We think that once we hit the age of 18 we must be independent. But we’re really not. Why? Because of the relationships they have with other people and resources. If a person is in any type of co-dependent relationship they are not independent, they are co-dependent. If a person ‘has’ to go to work because they ‘need’ the income, they’re not anywhere near independence. That rules out most of our population right there. Financial independence is a huge part of this, but it’s not everything. It’s just a whole different topic to cover.. Most people live their entire lives without being fully independent or achieving the freedom they could have. They have no idea how powerful and liberating independence could be. They don’t realize how they would absolutely minimize drama while getting the most value and happiness out of all relationships. The most powerful people in the world are independent and have a special type of relationship with other people and resources. It’s called interdependence. Interdependence is based on the respect of someone else’s independence. There’s no room for manipulation, coercion, oppression or backstabbing. Instead, it’s when two people can pool their independent efforts together. They can exchange value or resources to benefit each other and have a win/win relationship founded on respect and value instead of oppressing the other person. It takes some backbone to stand up and ‘be’ independent especially when other people want to keep you limited in co-dependent or oppressive relationships. When we had a barter economy in the early 19th century and there were more business owners, people had more independence. They exchanged and traded with other business owners. Look at the co-dependent ‘you owe me’ poverty mentality throughout much of America and compare it to even poorer countries where people take accountability and ‘find’ a way to make money such as being street vendors or hawking items. Times have obviously changed. We have a different mainstream relational reality which we just take for granted. People think that they must ‘go to a job’ and do the 9-5 but they only think that because it was what they were conditioned to believe and didn’t see anything else. The people who really have power and money have different relationships. They put together interdependent systems to provide opportunities for other people to be in a transactional exchange relationship; their work time for dollars. I’m talking about the ‘j.o.b.b.’ So many people will be continually stuck in this cycle dubbed the ‘rat race’ by Robert Kiyosaki because of the relationship they have with money and the other relationships they have in their life. People don’t realize the amount of power potential they have if all they did was change their relationships. The past decisions they made determined where they are now whether they want to take accountability or not. Key to actualizing your independence is by stepping up and taking accountability. You will then (ideally) free yourself from any limiting factors (including the ‘need’ for money). In the movie ‘Joe vs. the Volcano’, Joe realizes the importance of life and finally steps up and claims his independence. He goes back into his office with his true independence and in a show of bravado he quits his job and asks the secretary out who he never asked before. I’m not saying to quit your job. The way I did it was I worked in the evenings building something up when I wasn’t at my regular jobs. Though at the time of this writing I’m not financially independent just yet, I’m getting close. I haven’t had a ‘job’ in 8.5 years if you exclude the Army (’it’s an adventure’). I have a home office and I wake up when I want and I don’t have to be stuck in traffic like everyone else running the rat race. I’m closer than most to full independence (which includes debt freedom) but there’s still a ways to go. People will respect you wherever you go when you accept the power of your own independence. Then you can operate win/win with other people, even with those of greater social power than you. Why? Because of the types of relationships you have. So I encourage you to seek the resources if you’re interested in more satisfaction in life, less drama, less psychological abuse or opression and work towards ultimate freedom. Rion Williams is one of the foremost experts in dating advice, personal power and social dynamics. Learn how to be an alpha male who is comfortable in his own skin and succeeds with women and dating. 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